My 12' is exactly the same. Tried long, short, and all the way to grade 10... It always bends. Next step is dremeling a void in the stand so the head of the bolt doesnt contact the stand at all. Insted it will bottom against the spacer/bushing thing that runs thru the stand. I dont take credit on that idea, I've read it on this forum somewhere. I can't say goodbye to mine either so its just bolted down tight till I get some time to try that.
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